People don't forget!
Monday, May 9, 2011
Have you guys watched Superbad lately?
Monday, May 9, 2011
Have you guys watched Superbad lately?
That movie is funny.
Dub heads tonight kids. That's hipster for double header... you probably haven't hear about it or most of the music I listen to or artists I resp. (hipster for respect).
Anyways!
6:15 and 7:15 tonight, on the same field. Moore Rd/Hawthorn Dr. Field 10. It is probably the easiest field to get to, as it's the first one we usually pass, set back behind the huge pavilion. Here is the map http://www.rockickball.
I know we are down an Amelia, a Phil, a Brian and a me. I'll be there, but I'm not gonna be able to play quite yet. Let me know if anyone else is going to be out. We may need to grab an extra guy or two, but our ladies have been pretty consistently consistent. I have put the invite out there to Sandy (a kickball friend from the fall), Peter (retired JV soccer player), and Gabe's friend Ian (he knows a lot about Directv). If people have ideas we're looking for moral fortitude more than anything. I don't want anyone kicking a ball for Kick James unless they give at least 3% of their annual income to charity or Marshall Street Bar and Grill.
So start limbering up everyone. We've already had one terrible accident this season, benching the team captain and your hero for far too long. We're not F'n around anymore. Team stretches are back on. Yelling at each other for for sake of humilitation/motivation is back on. No more high fives! They're too dangerous, it's not a natural motion. We're strictly butt slapping from here on out.
See you then. Remember to car pool and bring drinks for drinkin.
The Very Reverend, Dr. Thomas Richard Norvil R Chew III, Esq.
Split em down the middle
(an email filled with questionable content for the workplace)
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Crude subject line, but that is exactly what we did last night.
You missed a good one... folks who weren't at GVP Field 10 last night.
I'm Kick James bravely fought the following:
- The weather (man that sun was bright)
- Parking (there just wasn't a lot of it)
- Parkour (there is just never enough of it!)
- Religious Persecution (Pilgrims!)
- Twin Brother Meth Chef's (MICHAEL! MICHAEL GET OFF THE TABLE!)
- The Arts (Phil could only play half of one game)
- Injury (Does anyone know any guys who are good at kickball?)
Throughout all of this we ended up 1 and 1 for the day making our record 2 wins and 2 dreadful defeats.
The double header offered so many classic moments, that I am sure to forget a lot and encourage you to reply all with your own accounts of last evenings transgressions.
One MVP would be too hard to choose so I'm going to give a blanket MVP to Ovaries! The ladies of the night (maybe I shouldn't call them that), besides picking up the slack for the increasingly decreasing number of Y chromosomes, celebrated an excellent showing.
Triumphs in pitching from Theresa "Just the Tips", who also earned her nickname (It is Just the Tips if you didn't read it 1 second ago and fielded like a champ, and Heidi who caught a ball and is probably still talking about it. Triumphs in fielding with catches also made by Renee who you would have thought cured cancer she was so excited and Jenna who made her kickball debut with three base hits, two runs, and catching a line drive that would have made me cry and look like an idiot.
The ladies seemed to find the consistently perfect kick with a solid low grounder down the third base line. The best of which came from Shelley, but was meant with one of our tragic flaws of the day, which is dudes hating the base they were supposed to be on. Kyle and Jim were champions of being as far away from the base as possible because they would rather be out than score runs. Dave, through an inner thigh (which was renamed the vagricept last night) injury, showed amazing flexibility on first by keeping his foot on the base while stretching as far as he could to catch a ball. It was a valiant effort and an astounding display of commitment to staying on the base, but none the less did not pay off.
Kyle also fell on his ass for almost no reason and that was hilarious.
Tina (automatic behind the plate), Casey (refreshed from her 3 hour nap), and all the other ladies picked up the slack for the fellas like no other... It reminded me of Venice in the Fall.
A very special Honorable Mention and co-MVP goes to our girl Lizz. Always willing to make her little brother look terrible in the eyes of his friends and loved ones, as he was leaving to go pretend to be someone around other people pretending to be other people, she was showing up in heals with 2 twelve packs of glory. Thank you Lizz! Thank you for being so much better than Phil and for helping us fill the picnic table with even more empties.
Houston, our brave umpire for both games, was a great guy and even through constant nonsensical yelling and Timmy teaching him how to do his job (seriously, it was necessary, I'm pretty sure he had no idea what most of the rules were) kept a smile on his face and the word referee on his t-shirt.
Big up to the ladies for having to pee the entire game and still drinking a bunch and then collectively sprinting into Marshall Street, Strong, or that dark alley (I know one of you did it, I just don't know which one) to relieve themselves.
Amazing new edition to the team in the form of Sandy. Standing around 5'10" and weighing in at around 160 pounds. Sandy is a friend of the team and newly appointed litigator who willingly shared his talents with us and will be coming back for more. Like a blaze of blonde feathery hair, Sandy could always be seen sprinting through the outfield to catch fly balls that really had no business being caught. The 105% he gave was fantastic and just enough to get him an invite to join Kick James (110% would have been better, but with all the injuries 105 will just have to do).
Like I said, I fully realize I am leaving a lot out. This email is already longer than all the other emails combined, but so much greatness occurred. Please fill in the blanks my friends. Please help me remember the things I forgot (like Jesse and Dave "stretching" together and the unspoken Kick James decision to torture and injure the really nice pitcher from the second team we played (seriously, we managed to knock that guy down at least 4 times).
If I think of more I'll reply all myself. I had a great time with everyone last night, but everyone else was certainly missed. Double headers from here on out, so I'll encourage everyone to come to as much as you can. Bring the kids. I think next Monday might turn into a K-9 kickball kelebration as a few people were talking about bringing their pups.
Much love, waning respect, constant aggravation-
Thomas
Disabled List
Gabe "The Dainty Dipper" - Knee injury sustained while standing in the outfield and whiffing twice while kicking.
Dave "Dave" - Vagricept injury sustained while not taking two steps to catch a ball at 1st base.
Kyle "I live with Just the Tips" - He isn't actually on the DL, but when he fell it was really funny (he also whiffed once).
Thomas "Pastey" Chew - Lower back injury sustained while walking in a straight line and being 67 years old.
Bob "" Bell - Wicked case of the 1929's from being too smart and talented to have time to play kickball.
Why do I keep on writing?! Make it stop, please just make it stop.
Sorry, everyone just got fired for spending over an hour reading an email.
My bad.
So you guys on Myspace or anything?
You missed a good one... folks who weren't at GVP Field 10 last night.
I'm Kick James bravely fought the following:
- The weather (man that sun was bright)
- Parking (there just wasn't a lot of it)
- Parkour (there is just never enough of it!)
- Religious Persecution (Pilgrims!)
- Twin Brother Meth Chef's (MICHAEL! MICHAEL GET OFF THE TABLE!)
- The Arts (Phil could only play half of one game)
- Injury (Does anyone know any guys who are good at kickball?)
Throughout all of this we ended up 1 and 1 for the day making our record 2 wins and 2 dreadful defeats.
The double header offered so many classic moments, that I am sure to forget a lot and encourage you to reply all with your own accounts of last evenings transgressions.
One MVP would be too hard to choose so I'm going to give a blanket MVP to Ovaries! The ladies of the night (maybe I shouldn't call them that), besides picking up the slack for the increasingly decreasing number of Y chromosomes, celebrated an excellent showing.
Triumphs in pitching from Theresa "Just the Tips", who also earned her nickname (It is Just the Tips if you didn't read it 1 second ago and fielded like a champ, and Heidi who caught a ball and is probably still talking about it. Triumphs in fielding with catches also made by Renee who you would have thought cured cancer she was so excited and Jenna who made her kickball debut with three base hits, two runs, and catching a line drive that would have made me cry and look like an idiot.
The ladies seemed to find the consistently perfect kick with a solid low grounder down the third base line. The best of which came from Shelley, but was meant with one of our tragic flaws of the day, which is dudes hating the base they were supposed to be on. Kyle and Jim were champions of being as far away from the base as possible because they would rather be out than score runs. Dave, through an inner thigh (which was renamed the vagricept last night) injury, showed amazing flexibility on first by keeping his foot on the base while stretching as far as he could to catch a ball. It was a valiant effort and an astounding display of commitment to staying on the base, but none the less did not pay off.
Kyle also fell on his ass for almost no reason and that was hilarious.
Tina (automatic behind the plate), Casey (refreshed from her 3 hour nap), and all the other ladies picked up the slack for the fellas like no other... It reminded me of Venice in the Fall.
A very special Honorable Mention and co-MVP goes to our girl Lizz. Always willing to make her little brother look terrible in the eyes of his friends and loved ones, as he was leaving to go pretend to be someone around other people pretending to be other people, she was showing up in heals with 2 twelve packs of glory. Thank you Lizz! Thank you for being so much better than Phil and for helping us fill the picnic table with even more empties.
Houston, our brave umpire for both games, was a great guy and even through constant nonsensical yelling and Timmy teaching him how to do his job (seriously, it was necessary, I'm pretty sure he had no idea what most of the rules were) kept a smile on his face and the word referee on his t-shirt.
Big up to the ladies for having to pee the entire game and still drinking a bunch and then collectively sprinting into Marshall Street, Strong, or that dark alley (I know one of you did it, I just don't know which one) to relieve themselves.
Amazing new edition to the team in the form of Sandy. Standing around 5'10" and weighing in at around 160 pounds. Sandy is a friend of the team and newly appointed litigator who willingly shared his talents with us and will be coming back for more. Like a blaze of blonde feathery hair, Sandy could always be seen sprinting through the outfield to catch fly balls that really had no business being caught. The 105% he gave was fantastic and just enough to get him an invite to join Kick James (110% would have been better, but with all the injuries 105 will just have to do).
Like I said, I fully realize I am leaving a lot out. This email is already longer than all the other emails combined, but so much greatness occurred. Please fill in the blanks my friends. Please help me remember the things I forgot (like Jesse and Dave "stretching" together and the unspoken Kick James decision to torture and injure the really nice pitcher from the second team we played (seriously, we managed to knock that guy down at least 4 times).
If I think of more I'll reply all myself. I had a great time with everyone last night, but everyone else was certainly missed. Double headers from here on out, so I'll encourage everyone to come to as much as you can. Bring the kids. I think next Monday might turn into a K-9 kickball kelebration as a few people were talking about bringing their pups.
Much love, waning respect, constant aggravation-
Thomas
Disabled List
Gabe "The Dainty Dipper" - Knee injury sustained while standing in the outfield and whiffing twice while kicking.
Dave "Dave" - Vagricept injury sustained while not taking two steps to catch a ball at 1st base.
Kyle "I live with Just the Tips" - He isn't actually on the DL, but when he fell it was really funny (he also whiffed once).
Thomas "Pastey" Chew - Lower back injury sustained while walking in a straight line and being 67 years old.
Bob "" Bell - Wicked case of the 1929's from being too smart and talented to have time to play kickball.
Why do I keep on writing?! Make it stop, please just make it stop.
Sorry, everyone just got fired for spending over an hour reading an email.
My bad.
So you guys on Myspace or anything?
No comments:
Post a Comment